Self Conversations

House buying me: "I'd better check my phone to see if anyone has called."
Sensible me: "You just woke up, it is too early for a bank or escrow company to call yet."
House buying me: "yeahbut...."
Sensible me: "No yeahbut. It's too early."
House buying me (in whiney voice): "Fine."

Later....
House buying me: "I'd better check my email. You know, just in case..."
Sensible me: "Not likely..."
House buying me: "Back off. I'm checking."

Later....
House buying me: "What if someone called while I was in the shower?"
Sensible me: "D would have told you. Or more likely, K would have brought you the phone."
House buying me: "They don't always do that."
Sensible me: "Oh, go ahead and check. You know you're going to anyway."

Still later....
House buying me: "I'd better check my phone again."
Sensible me: "IT'S IN YOUR POCKET FOOL. IF IT HAD RANG YOU WOULD HAVE KNOWN."
House buying me: "Nu-uh. What if I didn't hear it or feel it vibrate? It could happen. It happens to mom all the time."
Sensible me: "Didn't hear it ring...didn't hear it vibrate...listen to yourself. You are pathetic."
House buying me: "I know. Now give me that phone."

So it is noon. I've only check me email twice. That's good. The phone? Let's just say I haven't missed any calls. But if you'll excuse me, I think I'll go check just to make sure.